I've started to think of secondhand goods as "battle-tested." If this secondhand dresser is still stably on four legs after a lifetime in someone else's home, or this water pitcher survived decades of use in another's kitchen, then it's that much more likely to make it in my home full of small children.
I have been embracing this the last couple of years with clothes, and think around half of my closet is now from consignment. It started there and recently inspired me to switch from leasing a new car every three years to going back to buying used. I’m also drawn to old china sets people can barely give away these days so am betting a “downgrade” (but really an upgrade when it’s antique china!) will be coming in my kitchen soon. There’s something about switching from new to used that feels rebellious and I love it.
I’ve been on a decluttering journey as I am getting used to life without my deceased husband. I’m not buying anything new and just rearranging what I love to honor this new life.
I love that grey (and the green!) birch rug too! For me, it's also important to look at what things are made of and how they're made. I am delighted to see the warp is 100% cotton and the weft is 100% wool, AND it's double sided for twice the wear. A great long-term investment. Extra info: did you know wool absorbs volatile organic compounds from the air, and does not re-emit them even when heated? So this rug is also a built-in air cleaner!
IKEA's wool rugs are a really fantastic value. I own one and I am very impressed with the quality. Would never buy a synthetic rug for so many reasons!
I know firsthand (thanks to you) the power of rearranging a room. That change in perspective is so satisfying. Also, I LOVE the cover design of Ashlee's book. Brilliant.
I think I spent my whole early marriage/childrearing years not buying anything new. Maybe a Christmas gift here and there. But we were not deprived. My kids had plenty of clothes and toys and furniture. It was occasionally challenging, but I felt smart about finding quality items affordably.
Same for me when my husband walked out. Like you, i found it very satisfying to make ends meet that way. Fortunately I already enjoyed shopping secondhand, and a huge silver lining was that my children really learned the value of money, and are thrifty, debt-free adults! I expect your kids got the same benefit.
Ever since I first read about Ashlee’s work in your posts, I been working on not bringing new things in. I’ve been a fan of thrifting furniture and clothes for a while now but went through a phase a few years ago where I bought several new, but cheaply made 🙄, pieces of furniture. I had just spent years with hand-me downs from my family and friends that I didn’t like and didn’t fit whatever aesthetic I was attempting at the time, so I thought new furniture would satisfy me. While I like the look of a couple of my newer chairs (from 3 or more years ago), I likely could have found higher quality pieces used.
But that’s alright - progress over perfection, right? I’ll live with those somewhat regretted pieces for now because I don’t need to get new ones. I had a moment last month when I received an Amazon gift card for my birthday (unfortunate timing since it was the weekend I was participating in the boycott) when I wondered if I should look for new things for my new apartment. That is the reasoning my mom gave for giving me the gift card after I said I didn’t need a gift. I even went through my home, looking in cabinets and at decor and organizational pieces to see if anything was needed. And I couldn’t find a single thing that I felt like buying - and I think it may have been the first time I truly felt that way and it was great! I had what I wanted in my home and everything was organized in my smaller space the way that made sense for me.
I think one of the things that helped me feel better about my new space (went from a two-bed to a similar one-bedroom apartment when my youngest left for school overseas) was that I styled my shelves in my book cases differently from how they had been in the other place and repurposed a few small pieces of furniture. And as someone who frequently moves things around in my homes, I completely agree with Ashlee on how much that can make the space feel new and fresh.
Oh, and I started using grandma’s silver (and putting it in the dishwasher) instead replacing the Amazon flatware set I ended up hating. The silver has been carted around in its wooden storage box collecting dust and taking up shelf space for years. It used to only come out on Christmas!
Thanks for sharing Ashlee’s work! Her book is reserved at two different libraries since there’s a waiting list. I’m excited to read it!
And I loved the two homes you posted links for this week! I always look forward to those at the end of your story but these two were some of my favorites so far.
Love her tips and will check out the book! I did a year of not buying home decor or clothes and it helped me recognize how much mental energy all of that occupied for me. And rearranging (or even swapping out the art) always feels good.
“You are the steward of your stuff”—that’s a reminder I (and my entire family) needs on the regular. I spent a good part of my 20s wanting more, and now that I’m approaching my 40s, I just want to go as lean as possible.
If only we could "rescue" all the wonderful things in thrift stores! I got better and not buying treasures I came across while thrifting once I realized how much I value empty space and an uncluttered home, but it was something I struggled with too!
I’ve recently taken to mending our clothing instead of throwing it out. Especially my toddlers’ clothes. I used to throw away or donate their pants as soon as a small hole had been created. Now, I patch the holes with some simple stitches and my girls love their loved-and-repaired clothing. It feels good taking care of what we already own and subsequently taking care of Mother Earth by keeping items out of the waste stream and consuming less. I’m about to try this approach with our small home. Out kitchen is from the 1940’s and in dire need of a face lift. Instead of a gut-reno (which we can’t afford right now anyway), I’m planning on stripping our original hardwood cabinets that have unfortunately been painted over, patching up grout on our floor tile, repairing our wall plaster, and painting. I’ve already sourced some pre-loved wooden antique shelves and am excited to love and and repair our kitchen by hand ❤️
I've started to think of secondhand goods as "battle-tested." If this secondhand dresser is still stably on four legs after a lifetime in someone else's home, or this water pitcher survived decades of use in another's kitchen, then it's that much more likely to make it in my home full of small children.
I love this idea! Another writer I follow has said the same things about clothing.
Kelly I love this so much! Thank you for sharing.
This is fun to think about! No new things could feel like a prison…and instead it’s a fun way to work with what you have!
And truly, Ashlee makes it FUN. She's like a cheerleader for not shopping in the best possible way.
Love this idea and have been trying to teach it to my kids because we live in an area of hyper consumerism. Would love to read her book!!
I have been embracing this the last couple of years with clothes, and think around half of my closet is now from consignment. It started there and recently inspired me to switch from leasing a new car every three years to going back to buying used. I’m also drawn to old china sets people can barely give away these days so am betting a “downgrade” (but really an upgrade when it’s antique china!) will be coming in my kitchen soon. There’s something about switching from new to used that feels rebellious and I love it.
I promise you will have no trouble finding absolutely gorgeous antique china--there's a lot that needs a good home.
I’ve been on a decluttering journey as I am getting used to life without my deceased husband. I’m not buying anything new and just rearranging what I love to honor this new life.
I'm so sorry for your loss, but I love the way you are going about adapting.
I'm so sorry for your loss. What a huge time of change it must be. I hope that rearranging helps you feel settled in this next stage.
I love that grey (and the green!) birch rug too! For me, it's also important to look at what things are made of and how they're made. I am delighted to see the warp is 100% cotton and the weft is 100% wool, AND it's double sided for twice the wear. A great long-term investment. Extra info: did you know wool absorbs volatile organic compounds from the air, and does not re-emit them even when heated? So this rug is also a built-in air cleaner!
Also hoping I win the book!
IKEA's wool rugs are a really fantastic value. I own one and I am very impressed with the quality. Would never buy a synthetic rug for so many reasons!
I know firsthand (thanks to you) the power of rearranging a room. That change in perspective is so satisfying. Also, I LOVE the cover design of Ashlee's book. Brilliant.
Right? Even if you couldn't read the words, you would know what it was about.
Thank you so much! The little cart definitely signals something in our brains. ☺️
When I feel drawn to buying homewares online, I stop and pick up and declutter for 10 minutes. It helps—I swear!
I think I spent my whole early marriage/childrearing years not buying anything new. Maybe a Christmas gift here and there. But we were not deprived. My kids had plenty of clothes and toys and furniture. It was occasionally challenging, but I felt smart about finding quality items affordably.
Same for me when my husband walked out. Like you, i found it very satisfying to make ends meet that way. Fortunately I already enjoyed shopping secondhand, and a huge silver lining was that my children really learned the value of money, and are thrifty, debt-free adults! I expect your kids got the same benefit.
❤️ Thrifty and debt-free is exactly the kind of adult I am hoping my child will become too.
I shop and feel much the same way--so much so, that when I buy something new I am shocked by how much things cost.
Ever since I first read about Ashlee’s work in your posts, I been working on not bringing new things in. I’ve been a fan of thrifting furniture and clothes for a while now but went through a phase a few years ago where I bought several new, but cheaply made 🙄, pieces of furniture. I had just spent years with hand-me downs from my family and friends that I didn’t like and didn’t fit whatever aesthetic I was attempting at the time, so I thought new furniture would satisfy me. While I like the look of a couple of my newer chairs (from 3 or more years ago), I likely could have found higher quality pieces used.
But that’s alright - progress over perfection, right? I’ll live with those somewhat regretted pieces for now because I don’t need to get new ones. I had a moment last month when I received an Amazon gift card for my birthday (unfortunate timing since it was the weekend I was participating in the boycott) when I wondered if I should look for new things for my new apartment. That is the reasoning my mom gave for giving me the gift card after I said I didn’t need a gift. I even went through my home, looking in cabinets and at decor and organizational pieces to see if anything was needed. And I couldn’t find a single thing that I felt like buying - and I think it may have been the first time I truly felt that way and it was great! I had what I wanted in my home and everything was organized in my smaller space the way that made sense for me.
I think one of the things that helped me feel better about my new space (went from a two-bed to a similar one-bedroom apartment when my youngest left for school overseas) was that I styled my shelves in my book cases differently from how they had been in the other place and repurposed a few small pieces of furniture. And as someone who frequently moves things around in my homes, I completely agree with Ashlee on how much that can make the space feel new and fresh.
Oh, and I started using grandma’s silver (and putting it in the dishwasher) instead replacing the Amazon flatware set I ended up hating. The silver has been carted around in its wooden storage box collecting dust and taking up shelf space for years. It used to only come out on Christmas!
Thanks for sharing Ashlee’s work! Her book is reserved at two different libraries since there’s a waiting list. I’m excited to read it!
And I loved the two homes you posted links for this week! I always look forward to those at the end of your story but these two were some of my favorites so far.
Love this concept too, and would love to read the book!
Love her tips and will check out the book! I did a year of not buying home decor or clothes and it helped me recognize how much mental energy all of that occupied for me. And rearranging (or even swapping out the art) always feels good.
I think a lot of people who do similar challenges feel the same way. A year is impressive!
“You are the steward of your stuff”—that’s a reminder I (and my entire family) needs on the regular. I spent a good part of my 20s wanting more, and now that I’m approaching my 40s, I just want to go as lean as possible.
That sentence really stood out to me too. And yes, I can't believe the things I desired when I was younger when now all I want is less!
A great concept! I tend to “rescue” interesting items from thrift stores and yard sales but I have limited space so could use some guidance.
If only we could "rescue" all the wonderful things in thrift stores! I got better and not buying treasures I came across while thrifting once I realized how much I value empty space and an uncluttered home, but it was something I struggled with too!
Excellent point! Thank you!
Love the concept of no new things. There are 2 good thrift shops near me. Plan to visit them before buying new. Thank you
Oh, you are lucky to have two good ones!
I’ve recently taken to mending our clothing instead of throwing it out. Especially my toddlers’ clothes. I used to throw away or donate their pants as soon as a small hole had been created. Now, I patch the holes with some simple stitches and my girls love their loved-and-repaired clothing. It feels good taking care of what we already own and subsequently taking care of Mother Earth by keeping items out of the waste stream and consuming less. I’m about to try this approach with our small home. Out kitchen is from the 1940’s and in dire need of a face lift. Instead of a gut-reno (which we can’t afford right now anyway), I’m planning on stripping our original hardwood cabinets that have unfortunately been painted over, patching up grout on our floor tile, repairing our wall plaster, and painting. I’ve already sourced some pre-loved wooden antique shelves and am excited to love and and repair our kitchen by hand ❤️