Small things that make life feel rich
On cultivating a more abundant mindset in our homes
During the last year, I’ve been thinking a lot about what is enough and how to cultivate a feeling of abundance without over-consuming. It’s a balancing act trying to discover where contentment lies. I’m always having to remind myself that even though our apartment is small, it is enough–that a bigger one (probably) wouldn’t make us happier.
One thing that has been helpful in my quest for contentment is to identify what makes me feel like my cup is full—like I have “enough” and a little more. I describe this feeling as “rich” but you could substitute “rich” with “abundant” or “bountiful.”
To me, a “rich” life is one in which I have enough of everything I need (shelter, health, food, savings) not to worry, while also indulging in some small pleasures. In fact, it’s sometimes these small things that tip the scales towards a feeling of abundance. Having only one bathroom can feel scarce, but if it is hotel clean and stocked with a fancy soap and maybe a tiny nosegay of fresh flowers, that might make life feel rich.
Clearly identifying the small things that make you feel rich can help you avoid the compare-despair trap that is so easy to fall into (especially if your friends live in bigger, grander houses than you). I say “small” because those are the things we can easily control and even activate at will. (Being my own boss and being able to take a day off without asking anyone else makes me feel very rich indeed, but that took a big career change and a high tolerance for risk to pull off–so, not small.)
I’m thinking about the little, everyday things; for example, one thing that makes me feel a sense of abundance is a well-stocked and nicely-organized fridge. If I take the time to do a big grocery run, wash and cut up fruit, bake a batch of my favorite muffins, and cook a pot of beans, I’m going to feel rich every time I open the refrigerator door. A small investment of time and planning pays huge dividends.
Engage in acts of care
Another thing that makes me feel rich is taking care of my home and possesions. There’s nothing that feels more luxurious than a freshly-made bed with just-laundered sheets. Likewise, a clean and clutter-free apartment makes me feel rich (even if I was the person who cleaned it). I find I appreciate what I have more when I act like I care about it.
Indulge a little
Indulging in little treats can also make life feel more abundant–a fact I need to remind myself of. It’s easy to talk yourself out of small upgrades, but I’ve realized that sometimes the little indulgences that seem “frivolous” can actually pay huge dividends. For example, I received a fancy bar of Saipu soap as a gift and its lovely fragrance has made every shower a delight. (Conversely, when I bought the cheap, store brand of dish soap, I was punished with heavily-perfumed, synthetic scent, making me wish I’d paid the extra couple dollars for the brand I know I like.) Having fresh flowers always feels so bountiful, but I somehow have a hard time spending that extra $10 or $20 dollars to cheer up my home. Good coffee and organic half & half is my one non-negotiable daily indulgence.
Savor the small things
It also helps if you consciously savor the small luxuries. For example, on the day I wash our bed linens, I’ll often announce it to my son, “Fresh sheets!” making it something to look forward to and take notice of. You might take a shower earlier than usual and get into bed to read to savor that fresh-sheets feeling. Likewise, a premade mocktail is an even nicer treat on a Saturday night, if you actually sit down and enjoy it, rather than sip it while you cook. Good coffee is infinitely better sipped from a nice mug—even if it’s only for five minutes before you start the get-out-the-door routine.
What small things make you feel rich at home? I’d love to hear in the comments.
A related few posts from the archive:
3 More Things
The best small space I saw last week was the small house journalist Francine Raymond downsized to featured in this video by Inigo and on Francine’s Instagram account. It says she built it in her own garden: I am dying to know more!
Bookmarked to cook: Maybe
can finally convince me to love tempeh? This ginger-miso “meatball” recipe definitely has me intrigued.Color inspo: I somehow missed Dan Pelosi’s home when it was published back in February, but look at all this wonderful color! So joyful!
One of mine is getting my car washed! Our local place has the drive-thru wash, plus the incredible attendants vacuum and wipe down all the surfaces and windows. When my window glass is so clean, I can’t tell that the window is up, I feel like I’m part of the life of the rich and famous!
Another is treating friends (saying, “I’ve got it!” for a meal or movie tickets) and sharing (passing along books, lending camping supplies, volunteering a certain tool or gadget). Those opportunities remind me of all that I have that can be put to good use!
This is more mental, and likely a commentary on the sad state of working parenthood in America, but reliable babysitters! I get claustrophobic when I don't have options. It feels rich when I have the support to get the kids to all their activities without making my work life crazy juggling it all myself.
Tangible luxury that makes my daily life better was buying a espresso machine for my office when we returned to work full time (yes the secondhand one I bought from you 5 years ago is going strong at home!). I brought in china cups and make lattes for myself and co-workers. Federal government, but make it fancy.